Consistently Pissy and Other Stories

It’s been way too long since I have blogged on here and now that I’m logged in, today isn’t looking up for blog writing either.

I’ve been stuck in some kind of rut. If you were to ask my husband, apparently I’m always angry. Well fuck that, no I’m not.

I really did want to write something witty and humorous for all of you, but then it was like, not today Satan.


Do any other stay at home moms or stay at home dads feel me when I say I sometimes  feel like my whole life has turned to mush? Like the only reason I exist is to be at the beck and call of other people? Do you ever have moments where maybe you’re washing dishes and you think, “fuck this plate. Fuck it and all of it’s plate friends.” Or is it just me?


Do your days run together? Like Saturdays and Mondays could actually pass for the same day?

Do you ever wonder if other people wonder about the things that you wonder about?

That’s a lot of wondering.

Do “I Don’t Know”, “It Wasn’t Me”, and “I Forgot” live in your house, too?  What about, “I’ll Do It Later”?

I sometimes think that when I die my headstone won’t have my date of birth/death engraved on it, or even my name. It will simply say the phrase I utter 742 times a day, “Wash your hands.”

Nobody listens to me.


“Nobody” also lives in my house.

Do you ever think about having wine for breakfast? I haven’t done it, but I think about it. Who would tell on me, the dog?? I did have champagne for lunch once.

Best. Day. Ever.

Do you ever look at your piles of dirty laundry and think how it would only take one match to end it all? And then remember that running around in your birthday suit would get you arrested so you put the fucking clothes in the washer AGAIN.

Am I alone in these thoughts? Surely I’m not the only parent out there whose crazy boils that close to the surface on occasion.

Share your crazy with me today. Wear it loud and proud! I’ve missed all of you.

And would you look at that, I actually did just write a blog.Oops 🙂